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Did you know your cell phone might be linked to erectile dysfunction? If you’re suffering from ED or prescribed drugs like Tadalafil or Sildenafil, your phone is probably the last culprit on your mind. Of course, before taking any prescription medications, you should always seek professional advice from your physician or other qualified health care provider.
But it’s true: if you keep your cell phone in your bedroom, it might be putting a damper on the other activities you’d prefer to take place there. In the digital age, our mobile phones have become an integral part of our daily lives, from the moment we wake up to a screeching alarm to the second we fall asleep (with our sleep tracking app turned on, of course). They’re more than just a trend; our phones now define the way we live our lives.
But there are many times throughout the day when it’s appropriate to put the cell phone away. And time in the bedroom is one of them.
What’s the big deal? In this article, we’ll take a look at how your cell phone and other digital habits could be ruining your sex life and explore the potential connection between mobile phone use in the bedroom and a decline in intimacy.
How does your cell phone in the bedroom impact your sex life?
Recent studies suggest that keeping your mobile phone in the bedroom might be negatively impacting your sex life.
Results from a recent poll conducted by the National Sleep Foundation speak for themselves: “People reported putting their electronic devices away an hour before bed on an average of 2.0 days a week.” In other words, five out of seven days per week, people are using their electronic devices, including cell phones, within an hour of lights-out. This is very bad for sleep quality.
Most adults sleep with their mobile phones within arm’s reach. While this might seem harmless and convenient, it’s not great for your brain or sleep and can lead to a decline in both the quality and quantity of intimate moments between you and your partner.
One of the key factors is the impact of screens on sleep quality. As many people know, the blue light emitted by cell phones and other devices disrupts the production of melatonin, a hormone that is integral to sleep regulation. And, believe it or not, sleep regulation is just as important to sex as foreplay.
Poor sleep can lead to increased stress levels and reduced energy, both of which are detrimental to a healthy sex life; plus, disrupted sleep patterns can lead to hormonal imbalances, which will affect libido and overall sexual well-being.
According to the Sleep Foundation, “Sleep deprivation has been associated with reduced sexual desire and arousal in women. As a result, insomnia, one of the most common sleep disorders, may be a risk factor for sexual dysfunction. A lack of sleep and disrupted sleep have also been linked to a higher risk of erectile dysfunction.”
You may think that your poor sleep quality has nothing to do with your lower levels of sexual desire and satisfaction (after all, isn’t diet the most important?), but when compared to those with better sleep hygiene, it seems the connection is undeniable.
And that’s to say nothing of the constant pings, alerts, and notifications that come from your phone, which affect your anxiety levels and pull you out of the present moment every time. A phone can distract you from connecting with your partner as you both wind down from the day, and diverting attention away from your partner is bound to create emotional distance.
That brings us to phubbing. Have you heard of it?
How phubbing harms your relationships
Phubbing is a combination of the words “phone” and “snubbing” and is exactly what you’d think: snubbing someone in real life in favor of paying attention to your phone. According to The New York Times, “Ignoring a partner in favor of your phone, or ‘phubbing,’ can lead to feelings of distrust and ostracism.”
The article continues, “If you have had a romantic partner, you’ve most likely had the maddening experience of realizing that while you were blabbering on about something or another, they were focused on their phone. … research increasingly shows it can be insidious. A recent study linked higher levels of phubbing to marital dissatisfaction and… one study found that those who phub a lot are more likely to be phubbed themselves, creating a kind of ripple effect.”
Are you guilty of phubbing? Does your partner ever phub you? If you’re struggling to connect in the bedroom, this could be a big part of it. The more you phub or get phubbed, the less likely you are to be satisfied in your relationships. Or, put another way, the more you (or your partner) feel neglected due to the other person’s phone use, the less satisfied you’re likely to be with the relationship overall.
It may be surprising to hear all the harm your cell phone can cause, but it’s true!
How to limit phone use and improve your sex life
This might shock you if you have a phone, TV, iPad, and more in your bedroom on any given day, but the truth is that the only entertainment in the bedroom should come from your interactions with your partner, at least if you want to improve your sex life.
Your bedroom should be a safe haven for rest, intimacy, and limited distractions from the outside world, not scrolling through social media or watching videos in bed, both of which can also contribute to a delayed bedtime. One of the most powerful ways you can create this better sleep and sex environment is to leave your phone outside your bedroom while you sleep at night.
You might wonder how on earth you’ll be able to wake up for work! But good news: There’s still old-fashioned alarm clocks out there that work just fine. Or, pick a modern alarm clock that slowly wakes you as if with the sunrise. None of these require a phone nearby and can greatly improve both your sleep quality and your relationship connection time.
Creating a phone-free zone in the bedroom can promote better sleep and strengthen emotional connections between partners. Many couples who have intentionally removed phones from their bedrooms and created tech-free spaces report positive outcomes like improved communication, increased intimacy, and better sleep. And who doesn’t want that?
Disconnecting from devices, especially during intimate moments, is crucial to a healthy relationship and a flourishing sex life. If you do keep devices in your bedroom, make sure to turn on airplane mode, disable wireless functions (like cellular connection, WiFi, and Bluetooth), or unplug your WiFi router entirely while you sleep.
If you want to improve your relationship dynamics, sex included, work with your partner to establish a technology curfew and try new and improved bedtime rituals, like reading or engaging in meaningful conversations together.
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